The amazingly beautiful Audrey Hepburn suffered from body image issues (and "survivor's guilt").
It got me thinking: What purpose is this supposed to serve? All it did for me was make me more neurotic about looking at myself. Could it be that (gasp!) the website wants us to be even more obsessed about our looks and therefore invest more time and interest in their website? Of course me, the sucker for all marketing, fell right into this trap and clicked over to the "how to fight weight gain" button after looking at myself ten pounds heavier. (hangs head slowly and silently)
Anger. At myself and at this very popular website that I refuse to name. Why would anyone want to promote anything but a healthy attitude toward our bodies? All I want to say to myself and to this website is:
Who Cares? People gain weight. People lose weight. It's part of life.
Do you freak out if you gain weight? I know many of you don't even own a scale. I admire you for that!
To read the article on Dance Advantage click here or look for: Guest Post: Body Image — Are You Looking For Perfection In Your Reflection?
48 comments:
Ohh my...I am so with you on that...I am not sure I want to see myself 10 pounds bigger but I think I have a somehow healthy approche to my weight. I do not own a scale because I don’t really believe in it...As long as I fit in the size I want I am good :)
I can’t believe that Audrey had body image issues...She was so beautiful :)
Great post,sweetie!!!!
Very interesting and I think many of us can benefit from it:)
Kisses and see you soon:)
Argh, I would avoid a website like this like the devil. It must be hard when you are a dancer. I'm quite strict about my body weight, too; but I do admire women who are more relaxed with it. My sister for example never cares about her weight, it went up with her pregnancies and now that she's got 2 children and has a lot going on she just sheds the pounds without thinking much about it. No stress, and seems so much more natural. xoxo
I try not to weigh myself more than once a week.
Usually, I don't weigh myself, but lately I have been. I decided that I wanted to get into better shape -- workout more, eat better, etc. There's a history of diabetes in my family and both of my parents suffer from chronic illnesses. So I figured for a few months, I can obsess a bit to get myself really healthy and then just maintain. But I do hate weighing myself, especially since it's not accurate. When I was at my skinniest in the past, I was also very muscular and so I weighed more then than I do now. I try to ignore my weight and focus on my body fat percentage. We all have different bodies and different ideal weights -- I feel that body fat percentage is a better indicator than a number on a scale is. And Tiffany, I love it when you write posts like this and I get to share things. You talk about things that need to be out there. You're awesome.
I've always struggled with my self image because I'm curvy. When I got pregnant I gained a ridiculous SEVENTY pounds, and it did a number on how I felt about myself. Over the last year and a half I've lost most of the weight and really learned to appreciate how I look. I think it has a lot to do with becoming a mom, growing up and being content. As someone who struggled with an eating disorder for years, I would say that websites like that are dangerous!
I'm with Diana. I threw away my scale at least a year ago. I think it's too easy to get caught up in the number on the scale, when what you should really be paying attention to is how good (and, dare I say, fabulous) you feel in your clothes.
Wow, so hard to believe the lovely Miss Hepburn had body image issues!!
I am one of the few that actually does NOT own a scale. However, I have a thyroid problem which caused me to gain 25 pounds over the span of a few weeks... very, very scary. Luckily for me, at that point in time I barely weighed more than a feather and this sudden weight gain brought me up to a more normal size. I do fear that it will happen again (it still can even though I take meds for it) and cause not only self esteem but also health issues.
:(
Honestly, I can't stand the way we are so image conscious these days especially... unfortunately it's only getting worse. And it's such a stupid and empty thing to be concerning ourselves with. I have never seen a kitty or a doggie look in a mirror and judge their image... and is there anything cuter than one of those little creatures?
Me oh my what a perfect post for how I was feeling this morning. Sometimes I wish I didn't care but I do. I definitely own a scale and get on it several times a week. I do weight watchers so I calculate my weight down to the tenth of a pound. I balloned up to a HUGE size 3 years ago and have been battling to get the last of the weight off for awhile now. All I know is sometimes I wish I didn't care or that no one else cared. Either way my main goal is to get into a healthy BMI and weight for my height if it isn't the greatest number I won't care because I will be healthy...well hopefully I won't care :).
GREAT POST!!
What a great post!! When I notice I have gained a lil weight I will eat a lil less the next day or do a crunch or two but I don't think I could go on that site because it would make me obsessed. Your absolutely right. People gain weight, people lose weight it's how life runs. I try not to dwell too much on it but it will tempt me eventually. But knowing I'm not the only one helps. Helps alot!
I haven't weighed myself in years and I don't think people should focus on their weight at all (unless of course they are at a point where it is becoming unhealthy). People should focus on being healthy, eating better foods, & doing other things & pursuing their passions.
No scale in my house. I believe in the law-of-attraction. I fill my house with cute skirts that I must fit into rather than a scale that makes me think about weight at all. When I was younger, the more I tried to lose weight, the more I gained. It fits right in with the law of attraction. We get what we think about (in this case, thinking about weight gives you more weight). Don't know how it works, but I believe it does!
oxoxo
Denalee
You truly write some of the best weight pieces, Tiffany. To be honest, I can't own a scale, it's something that I really don't believe people should have in their house (especially if you have children!) as it just freaks you out. :/
I so agree! Great point! I love that you are sending out positive messages!
I struggled with body image growing up, and it's still a constant battle to be good to myself. The truth is, my physical response to hunger is anxiety-I don't assume I need a sandwich, I'm convinced something is horribly wrong! Thank you for the wonderful article; let's all keep being good to ourselves.
I so agree- and yes, like everyone else we all *secretly* want to do it! And then anger always comes after...why do we need this? We don't!
I own a scale and can say with full honesty I'm so so good about not overdoing the weighing thing. Maybe once a week. I went through a period about a year ago where it was all I did - get on the scale. It started to take over my mind in an unhealthy way - even though I was getting healthy. Never again everyday weigh ins!
I agree!! And I love agree with Brandi too - I love that you address these types of issues with so much good things to say (ie: your Glamour post too!).
I used to struggle with weight issues all the time, even though I wasn't hugely overweight. It was always a mental thing with me. It was a long road, and trying all kinds of workouts, going to the gym, and nothing worked, leaving me discouraged.
I finally found a workout that worked for me (The Tracy Anderson Method...I rave about it all the time now :), and it literally changed my life. I no longer woke up thinking about how much I weighed, I never think twice anymore about enjoying the food that's in front of me. Because this workout changed my body in a way that nothing else before had, in a way that I never thought possible, and I just saw results so amazingly...I never really worry about my weight anymore. It's the most amazing feeling in the world. Literally changed my life.
So I don't own a scale either. I rarely weigh myself and instead see how I fit in my clothes.
I think we all just need to find an antidote to this obsession with losing weight/the perfect body. We all know it logically, but emotionally, it's still such a sensitive subject.
Thanks for addressing this, Tiffany. So glad there's you in the blogging world :)
Great post. I'm a stick thin girl and even I worry about weight... either that I'm gaining or that I'm losing too much. It's weird, and sad. I don't exactly freak out but it worries me.
It's sad about the dance community, too. I used to dance ballet, and there would be these girls who would starve themselves. You'd see them getting thinner and thinner with each month.
I don't have a scale but I can tell when I'm gaining weight or losing muscle. I use my clothes as guides and honestly when I start gaining weight I can tell by my moods. Lack of exercise always shows up in me by making me into Mrs. Crankypants.
I fight the scale issue all the time. I use it as more of a check every now and again to see where I am.
A couple years ago I lost 35 pounds and I kept it off for over a year. But then life got crazy(er) with our remodel and other things that over the following year I gained back about 18 of those pounds. It disappoints me...but I guess, like you said, that's life! I try to love me just the way I am....but there's always that nagging dissatisfaction hovering. OH well! Everyday is a journey towards becoming a better 'you', right? Sorry that was long ;)
ewwwwwwww!! it's life and you can be "bigger" and be in better shape than a thin person. i try to ignore all the hyp about weight! just be healthy! :)
i do NOT own a scale! i worry about what i feel like and not what i way...now i did have to go to the doctor and gained 10 pounds in the last year...ehhhhh
but it only motivated me to be healthier and now i am! yay
Oh my, that website could get into the hands of some very sensitive people and send them in the wrong direction.
I don't own a scale and I have no interest in knowing how much I weigh. It's just a number and I am much happier listening to my body and paying attention to what I am eating, how much I excercise and how good I feel about myself. I think how good I feel is much more important than what a scale will tell me. I know that it can be a hard thing to deal with for many girls (and guys!) and I'm lucky to be fairly happy with my body but none of us need anyone or any websites putting ideas into our head that we aren't perfect just because our body type may not be perfect in someone else's eyes.
Great post and great article!
i am so glad you didn't link to that website! gah! like we all don't have enough pressure on this issue already! bleh!
and you are right. people gain weight and lose weight. whaddya gonna do but do the best that you can.
I don't own a scale, I can just look in the mirror and see how I look, if I'm gaining weight or not, and if my clothes fit or not. Here's the deal (for me at least). If I'm in a good mental spot, being helpful to other people and just generally trying to see what I can give to the world rather than vice versa, I feel great about my body. If I'm stuck in self-centeredness, I start to obsess that I need to lose a few pounds. That's just how it goes.
i just love food and dancing to music.
life's too short the worry about weight loss.
this is a wonderful post.
:)
I do :( I do because wearing tights and a leo, or teensy little shorts, or any other revealing outfit on stage is very humbling, terrifying, revealing... those stage lights show everything! I try not to worry about it, but being a dancer, it's HARD...
xoxo J
thanks for talking about this! sadly women are so often (i can be included at times) slaves to the scale. but really, what do the numbers even mean? they don't necessarily represent good or bad health & they for sure do not represent beauty!
I'm so glad you wrote about this. It's been a real struggle for me lately. I've been taking more dance classes and running after an ankle injury, and having so much fun. But after a health issue earlier this year, I've lost a lot of weight fast and now worry I'm too thin or underweight. But everyone else thinks I look fabulous b/c we're trained to think the super skinny look is hot---but the dancing and running really fuels my creativity and makes me feel great. So I understand the problem. Gaining and losing weight, even if you do or don't need to, can really mess with your mind. I know it's messing with mine!
Thank you for sharing this! It is so important to talk about. I think I am going to post about this, too...
I totally don't own a scale. I go by the fit of my clothes. If they start getting tight, it's time to amp up the exercise and healthy eating!
I'm right with ya! I just try to eat healthy and exercise and not focus so much on the numbers.
My sister has struggled with both anorexia and bulimia! She needs to read this article...you ARE more than the number on the scale!
Bravo! xoxo
Great article. I don't own scales but must admit to jumping on and sneaking a look when I'm at my parents' place. Not that it really matters what it says, but if the scales are there then I'm curious. xx
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I do not own a scale.. I am always a bit paranoid about the actual number so I rather not look.
I think we do tend to obsess but we shouldnt
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With love, Samm
I don't own a scale, but if I feel parts of my belly and legs starting to move of their own volition I'll take up biking and walking a little more often for a few weeks. :-)
amazing post! what's survivor's guilt?
I don't own a scale and don't want to ever own one because I would get horribly fixated. My weigh story is a bit odd, when I was a child and a teen I struggled with gaining weigh, I danced since very young and many people would think that I had an eating disorder, it was awful! - I never really felt fat until I got pregnant and well, then I understood it was part of the process but when the baby was born I was in utter shock, I had never felt that lack of energy and difficulty to perform my daily routine and constantly gasping for air. I have lost some of the weigh but then decided 10 extra pounds wouldn't harm me, so I'm just trying to get back into healthy shape but not really losing weigh. I admire you for being straight forward about this, it is a huge thing now, with people trying to look like anyone else but themselves. You have a beautiful heart!
xo
Love this post! It's very relevant today. I love those Audrey Hepburn pictures!!!!
Best wishes from one blogger to another,
~Zabrinah
This is such a great post. Weight is such an emotionally tied issue for many people. Keeping healthy mindset is the only way to translate to a healthy body state.
oh my! I don't even have the time to visits websites like that but I'm pretty sure they can be extremely dangerous to some people. my usual concern is how to gain some weight ;)
It all begins in the mind. I was not brought up in a house with scales so I do not have one in my houses.
I go on the professional scale once per annum at the doctors for example.
I am out in the nature daily walking briskly and I eat mindfully for physically and mental strength.
I had no idea such websites exist!;-)
i just wanna be healthy. and eat cheese.
great post... these days i'm a bit more conscious about it because my clothes are telling me that i've gained a bit extra pounds here and there... should we worry? probably not because it will not make us happy at all...
Great Article!!!
Having been small my entire life I admit that yes, I don't want to gain weight. I'm even a bit scared of it. I'm fully aware that having only gained 8 lbs. since I was 18 (I'm umm, beyond 30 now...) is very lucky. Therefore, I do not own a scale because I know myself and it will turn into a bad obsession for me.
The only time I get conscious about my weight is anytime I'm with my parents or family members. I'm not fat or super skinny, in the middle ground with some curves. I think the worst moment was when they criticized my weight during Thanksgiving dinner. Lucky for me, a college student life of ramen noodles didn't stop me from finishing a real meal. Other than that, I'm pretty confident with my weight! Everyone I know thinks I look great and the compliments rock! It's really all about being with positive people.
I don't own a scale. I am a busy person, too busy to sit around & think too much about food, partly b/c of my 4 kids, and partly b/c that's just the way I'm wired. I'm often too busy to eat too much, lol. An apple, a half sandwich, etc. Great for weight control, although I need to add back into my life yoga. Pronto like.
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